My friend Dave is my book buddy. I appreciate my friendship with Dave because he is passionate about literature, ideas, and how we put the words together when we discuss both. I love that about him. There are only a handful of people in my life who love books and the deeper ideas when we parse poetry and imagery as much as I do. He is one of my great fans with my writing as well. He not only reads them but he responds to the ideas I spin out on paper and I love knowing where he connected with it. After reading my blog last night he told me he thought I had more to say on the idea of incompleteness. He felt there is more for me to get out. Dave has been my friend a long time; he’s known some of the big things I’ve worked out. I would consider his opinion fairly accurate.
In true Dave fashion he sent me the following scripture to go along with my 'man feels his emptiness' ideas:
7In the days of His flesh [Jesus] offered up definite, special petitions [for that which He not only wanted [a]but needed] and supplications with strong crying and tears to Him Who was [always] able to save Him [out] from death, and He was heard because of His reverence toward God [His godly fear, His piety, [b] in that He shrank from the horrors of separation from the bright presence of the Father]. (Hebrews 5:7 Amplified)
This is deep scripture for me when coupled with the previous post, but I’m still unpacking it. The part I did get immediately was this: Jesus had to fully become human. Humanity is fully separated from God. My initial thought is Jesus had never been separated from the fellowship of the Father ever. He knew what separation was going to feel like. Perhaps we just have gotten used to it? The deep emptiness we feel, Jesus knew he would have to endure the emptiness as well. I wonder if we just have no earthly idea of what fullness means? We as descendants of Adam are so removed we have no concept of what it was like to be in the fullness of God’s presence. Once separated we knew no more fullness - Jesus had to fulfill the fully human part which was becoming sin, separating him from the father, so that we may know fullness.
It’s an identifiable revelation. I understand the power of the cross a bit more. It’s intense though, the power of the cross. I am humbled to think of the times I have prayed, God this is hard did Jesus really have to go through this part? But somewhere he did. He had to make the hard choice too. He had to pray and seek God for the strength to move forward in what he was made to do. He had to die to what he wanted and to think all that was just for us…puts my sacrifices into a much better perspective to be honest with you.
Life is hard. We balance so many things externally and sort so many things internally. Where is there a rewiring needed in you? I know it hurts but let it rewire. It’s worth it. Imagine if Jesus decided not to do his? Where would any of us be then?
Tuesday, August 31, 2010
Monday, August 30, 2010
Bridging the Gap
Man feels his emptiness. I wonder why that rings in me. It’s hanging on a sticky from my monitor. It’s not necessarily an encouraging statement, but some how it is. Maybe because it identifies something in me I haven’t known what to call before. I wonder if you have to get used to the ache of knowing you live in a broken place, never fully satisfied because you are separated from the one who made you.
It’s an interesting thought though, Man feels his emptiness. I sure do. I always have. I don’t know how to explain it, but inside there has always been something aching for something deeper. I sought in vain knowing there was something tangible about Jesus, but I felt as though I would never get there. Somehow he never relented and at 24 I finally realized what I was looking for. I am thankful for the revelation, thankful it’s me, thankful for understanding Jesus named things like emptiness within me. Emptiness is hard to describe with words, it’s just empty.
I like when things have a name. That emptiness would have an identifiable definition within my soul is comforting. I find comfort in the understanding of how and why I am how I am. It lets me know I’m not crazy and not alone. Humans are funny. As much as we struggle for individuality and to stand out in a crowd, we also desperately long to fit in and know we aren’t the only ones. Isolation is a far greater fear, for me isolation is the tangible form of emptiness. By understanding isolation I better understand emptiness. It’s the separation I feel, but the truth is there is a bridge in the gap. I allowed the gap to be bridged when I understood the sacrifice of the cross for me and in the single act of Jesus, I forever have a hope. I know one day the emptiness will be filled with the fullness of God and I have a brief time of separation.
I think looking at the words, Man feels his emptiness, allows me permission to identify it. I haven’t figured it out yet but for some reason as I learn to identify the feelings I have I can handle them better. As I give the feeling a name, like emptiness, I can compartmentalize the emotion and tell it the truth. I know it’s hard but I can control my emotions. They are valid and important, but knowing what they are allows me freedom to speak directly to it.
I appreciate growing. I am thankful for revelation. I like how words can hang from my monitor for weeks at a time just to help me identify something with in me; which then in turn allows me to hand it over to Jesus and renew my thoughts on how I feel. It replaces emptiness with fullness and fullness is why he came.
It’s an interesting thought though, Man feels his emptiness. I sure do. I always have. I don’t know how to explain it, but inside there has always been something aching for something deeper. I sought in vain knowing there was something tangible about Jesus, but I felt as though I would never get there. Somehow he never relented and at 24 I finally realized what I was looking for. I am thankful for the revelation, thankful it’s me, thankful for understanding Jesus named things like emptiness within me. Emptiness is hard to describe with words, it’s just empty.
I like when things have a name. That emptiness would have an identifiable definition within my soul is comforting. I find comfort in the understanding of how and why I am how I am. It lets me know I’m not crazy and not alone. Humans are funny. As much as we struggle for individuality and to stand out in a crowd, we also desperately long to fit in and know we aren’t the only ones. Isolation is a far greater fear, for me isolation is the tangible form of emptiness. By understanding isolation I better understand emptiness. It’s the separation I feel, but the truth is there is a bridge in the gap. I allowed the gap to be bridged when I understood the sacrifice of the cross for me and in the single act of Jesus, I forever have a hope. I know one day the emptiness will be filled with the fullness of God and I have a brief time of separation.
I think looking at the words, Man feels his emptiness, allows me permission to identify it. I haven’t figured it out yet but for some reason as I learn to identify the feelings I have I can handle them better. As I give the feeling a name, like emptiness, I can compartmentalize the emotion and tell it the truth. I know it’s hard but I can control my emotions. They are valid and important, but knowing what they are allows me freedom to speak directly to it.
I appreciate growing. I am thankful for revelation. I like how words can hang from my monitor for weeks at a time just to help me identify something with in me; which then in turn allows me to hand it over to Jesus and renew my thoughts on how I feel. It replaces emptiness with fullness and fullness is why he came.
Wednesday, August 25, 2010
Good with Good
I was legitimately ill for the better part of last week. I didn't go to church, I missed some work and still have the lingering seal bark cough. I haven't been quite so sick in some time. I went to the doctor and they even made me wear a mask. I'm not kidding. Take a look!
I mean really? Was this necessary? I'm fine and on the mend, but what I find interesting is how it has sort of jump started something new for me. I feel like the last few months have been this emotional roller coaster with so much change and challenge. Now since coming out of my "days of recovery" I feel better inside too. I feel recharged emotionally. Things have laid down, something's been changed and I finally feel like I have caught my footing in this transition of growth. Learning to stretch your capacity can really start to bend your knees; you've got to readjust your footing.
I feel like I'm finding my footing. At least for now. I know there is more to come. I never will stop growing, life will continue to be challenging, but for this growth spurt I seem to have adjusted to the weight and things are good.
I appreciate status quo. There is something within me that finds these bits of respite to be so peaceful. Joe's preaching tonight encouraged me by reminding me about peace. The comfort of peace and things to cultivate peace. I am grateful for grace and appreciate peace. I'm also thankful for nights like tonight, where there's not much to write about just a good night.
Made new friends tonight, saw people get saved, smiled a lot, was told I looked pretty, got to chat with the hottest guy I know for a second, yep it was a good day.
Thankful
Full
Blessed
I mean really? Was this necessary? I'm fine and on the mend, but what I find interesting is how it has sort of jump started something new for me. I feel like the last few months have been this emotional roller coaster with so much change and challenge. Now since coming out of my "days of recovery" I feel better inside too. I feel recharged emotionally. Things have laid down, something's been changed and I finally feel like I have caught my footing in this transition of growth. Learning to stretch your capacity can really start to bend your knees; you've got to readjust your footing.
I feel like I'm finding my footing. At least for now. I know there is more to come. I never will stop growing, life will continue to be challenging, but for this growth spurt I seem to have adjusted to the weight and things are good.
I appreciate status quo. There is something within me that finds these bits of respite to be so peaceful. Joe's preaching tonight encouraged me by reminding me about peace. The comfort of peace and things to cultivate peace. I am grateful for grace and appreciate peace. I'm also thankful for nights like tonight, where there's not much to write about just a good night.
Made new friends tonight, saw people get saved, smiled a lot, was told I looked pretty, got to chat with the hottest guy I know for a second, yep it was a good day.
Thankful
Full
Blessed
Sunday, August 22, 2010
Algebra
As I left church last Sunday morning I came to a light with a homeless couple who are often by my house holding a sign reading, “Lost Home, Have kids, Need money for hotel.” I was pulling into the inside left turn lane creeping up along a long line of cars in the right, as the man started crossing the lane in front of me to a car to my right. The woman had her hand out and as she passed some money she held his hand while speaking to him. I glanced at the bill and noticed it wasn’t a dollar or two they were clasping together, but a $20 bill. She let go and he passed back in front and as I came even with her window I realized it was a single mom from my church.
I don’t know her well at all and only really know her by name and face. I couldn’t even tell you who her kids are, though with me, that’s not really saying much. She and I have quite a few mutual friends and through the grapevine I have heard at some point not too long ago her house burned down. To stack circumstance against her she lost her car some how followed by her job. Since then I have also heard recently she has obtained a new job, a real blessing of a job, and she was able to obtain a car. Rolling to a stop I put my window down and said, “Well done.”
She looked over at me, “it’s what we’re called to do right?”
We finished our brief conversation and I put my window back up. The light changed and we stated to move, further up the road I pull in behind her and notice she has a table fan fastened to her dashboard for days when we are having triple digit weather. I thought to myself, there is a woman who has seen some stuff.
Think about it. Knowing these circumstances, $20 seems like LOADS of money to give away, I’ve never thought to give a homeless family $20. I’ll give a couple of bucks but never have I been compelled to give that much away from the window of my car. My heart is lacking abundance in the moment. I see the single mom as a hero. I have learned in my brief time with the Lord, trust is not something that comes for free. Somehow I had to earn it. I don’t know how to explain it, how do I have to earn my ability to trusting God? It’s one of those things where he confounds our logic and one-and-one doesn’t make two. Trusting God is not just a gifting, it’s something to earn. It comes from really walking through some hard stuff and still standing. When nothing makes sense and all seems overwhelming you stand and trust God has this! Her actions were evidence to this kind of trust working in her life.
Every time I look at the single mom now I see such a woman of abundance. It flowed from her. Even as she looked at me and said, “It’s what we’re called to do right?” She didn’t know who was watching and she did it anyway.
I had one of those really amazing phone calls with Angie, the single mom I wrote about earlier, last night. We were on the phone for hours stirring up our faith and sharing what God was stirring up within each of us. She called me to pray for a girl in our cell group together. As she talked to me about the girl she’s really invested her love on-I thought of Megan. I thought of how passionate about her I am. How much I see the vision of God over her life. As Angie talked to me about the girl I thought about all of us. About how if we all just got passionate about one person in our life, one person that needs to be loved. No matter who you are, or where your life is, there is always at least one person in your immediate world who is screaming on the inside to be loved. Imagine if we all got really passionate about someone, someone other than yourself, and someone other than a romantic partner?
Opportunity is all around us, if we only take the time to look.
Imagine the chain reaction. We could change a generation. You and me and the focus of others, breeding passion to the next, as one by one each finds their place and love is what remains. That’s a BIG picture! Come help me paint it!
I don’t know her well at all and only really know her by name and face. I couldn’t even tell you who her kids are, though with me, that’s not really saying much. She and I have quite a few mutual friends and through the grapevine I have heard at some point not too long ago her house burned down. To stack circumstance against her she lost her car some how followed by her job. Since then I have also heard recently she has obtained a new job, a real blessing of a job, and she was able to obtain a car. Rolling to a stop I put my window down and said, “Well done.”
She looked over at me, “it’s what we’re called to do right?”
We finished our brief conversation and I put my window back up. The light changed and we stated to move, further up the road I pull in behind her and notice she has a table fan fastened to her dashboard for days when we are having triple digit weather. I thought to myself, there is a woman who has seen some stuff.
Think about it. Knowing these circumstances, $20 seems like LOADS of money to give away, I’ve never thought to give a homeless family $20. I’ll give a couple of bucks but never have I been compelled to give that much away from the window of my car. My heart is lacking abundance in the moment. I see the single mom as a hero. I have learned in my brief time with the Lord, trust is not something that comes for free. Somehow I had to earn it. I don’t know how to explain it, how do I have to earn my ability to trusting God? It’s one of those things where he confounds our logic and one-and-one doesn’t make two. Trusting God is not just a gifting, it’s something to earn. It comes from really walking through some hard stuff and still standing. When nothing makes sense and all seems overwhelming you stand and trust God has this! Her actions were evidence to this kind of trust working in her life.
Every time I look at the single mom now I see such a woman of abundance. It flowed from her. Even as she looked at me and said, “It’s what we’re called to do right?” She didn’t know who was watching and she did it anyway.
I had one of those really amazing phone calls with Angie, the single mom I wrote about earlier, last night. We were on the phone for hours stirring up our faith and sharing what God was stirring up within each of us. She called me to pray for a girl in our cell group together. As she talked to me about the girl she’s really invested her love on-I thought of Megan. I thought of how passionate about her I am. How much I see the vision of God over her life. As Angie talked to me about the girl I thought about all of us. About how if we all just got passionate about one person in our life, one person that needs to be loved. No matter who you are, or where your life is, there is always at least one person in your immediate world who is screaming on the inside to be loved. Imagine if we all got really passionate about someone, someone other than yourself, and someone other than a romantic partner?
Opportunity is all around us, if we only take the time to look.
Imagine the chain reaction. We could change a generation. You and me and the focus of others, breeding passion to the next, as one by one each finds their place and love is what remains. That’s a BIG picture! Come help me paint it!
Thursday, August 12, 2010
La La La
To encourage you: you can do it. Keep focused, keep fighting, remind yourself you are loved, depend on grace, encourage, and smile.
You're Awesome. I believe in you and in the words of Dori from Finding Nemo, "Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming."
Don't forget to take in the view.
You're Awesome. I believe in you and in the words of Dori from Finding Nemo, "Just keep swimming. Just keep swimming."
Don't forget to take in the view.
Monday, August 9, 2010
For Will Chappell
My new car, Barbie, is settling in ok. She's a bit hippy and rattles some but she's smooth and is doing me right so far. She has this piece of rubber going around the windshield, I learned day two of our uniting it is loose and smacks loudly on the roof. It's an unnerving racket. I don't do well with irritating sound. I get that from my dad. Sometimes, when I breathe he'll ask, "Ginny, you need to breathe like that?" He makes me laugh. I can appreciate it now as there are noises like smacking, rattles or shakes, or repetitive banging that drive me nuts!
My dad helped me out yesterday to get that to stop! Praise the Lord! I have breakfast with my parents every Sunday after church, after breakfast yesterday Dad got in my car and we went to the auto parts store to get adhesive for this rubber thing. The radio doesn't go on when my dad is in the car. It's another annoyance of just noise and I'm ok with no radio as well. It facilitates communication, and come on now; we're talking about me here. As soon as thumps started up dad sat listening for a moment, cocks his head toward me and says, "Damn, that's annoying as hell!" It is indeed, it is indeed.
Dad and I get to the auto parts store and start moseying around the different options for what we needed. My dad is very thorough in his products for car stuff. He has to read all the labels to make sure we're getting the best one for what we need.
After about my third circle of the store looking at steering wheel covers and air fresheners, the only parts that interest me in an auto store, my dad calls me over to make the final decision about our adhesive supplies. As we come to a stop in front of what we are looking for my dad bends his knees and sort of braces himself. I'm not really sure what's going on. Maybe it's how he bends down now? And then. He Farted.
A long chorus with face to match came out of that man! I don't know why I was so mortified? I guess because it was so intentional. He did not care. I glanced around.
"Dad, we're in public."
"And I had to fart." He replied simply.
I don't want to encourage this behavior, at least when I am around him, but he made me laugh. He didn't care and there really wasn't anyone around. He wasn't intending to be rude, he was being my dad who needed to fart and you gotta do what you gotta do.
Oh dad. I guess when you're kids are grown and your hair is gray, you've worked hard your whole life and are about to retire, you feel entitled to do as you please.
Ha ha I love my dad.
Call yours; he really does want to hear from you.
My dad helped me out yesterday to get that to stop! Praise the Lord! I have breakfast with my parents every Sunday after church, after breakfast yesterday Dad got in my car and we went to the auto parts store to get adhesive for this rubber thing. The radio doesn't go on when my dad is in the car. It's another annoyance of just noise and I'm ok with no radio as well. It facilitates communication, and come on now; we're talking about me here. As soon as thumps started up dad sat listening for a moment, cocks his head toward me and says, "Damn, that's annoying as hell!" It is indeed, it is indeed.
Dad and I get to the auto parts store and start moseying around the different options for what we needed. My dad is very thorough in his products for car stuff. He has to read all the labels to make sure we're getting the best one for what we need.
After about my third circle of the store looking at steering wheel covers and air fresheners, the only parts that interest me in an auto store, my dad calls me over to make the final decision about our adhesive supplies. As we come to a stop in front of what we are looking for my dad bends his knees and sort of braces himself. I'm not really sure what's going on. Maybe it's how he bends down now? And then. He Farted.
A long chorus with face to match came out of that man! I don't know why I was so mortified? I guess because it was so intentional. He did not care. I glanced around.
"Dad, we're in public."
"And I had to fart." He replied simply.
I don't want to encourage this behavior, at least when I am around him, but he made me laugh. He didn't care and there really wasn't anyone around. He wasn't intending to be rude, he was being my dad who needed to fart and you gotta do what you gotta do.
Oh dad. I guess when you're kids are grown and your hair is gray, you've worked hard your whole life and are about to retire, you feel entitled to do as you please.
Ha ha I love my dad.
Call yours; he really does want to hear from you.
Saturday, August 7, 2010
Unpacking
It has been a tumultuous few months with worth issues. Thanks to the blog I can tell you I received the revelation of my “worth and significance” issues on May 1. I talk about meeting with a friend in the post Faith Walks, and that is when I got the revelation. It’s been three months of working this out. God bless my friends who patiently help me unpack the layers of this revelation. It’s so dang big. It is layer upon crusty layer of fermented issue upon fermented issue. Each one keeps showing the same core problem but gosh almighty is it almost over?
Judah Smith encouraged me with his preaching on being in the “Meantime” and meantime is where I am. I was encouraged as well because I seem to be right on track but I’m a bit seasick to be honest. Tonight was the end of conference and as I said on Monday, my world is definitely larger, and a greater revelation of God has unfolded before me. I got so much vision and purpose and truth. I’m so excited for the coming months. I have no idea what is in store, but everything is right on time. I feel the Holy Momentum rolling through my life and as each layer is peeled back it adds fuel to the flame encouraging me for soon coming speed; like rocket boosters reaching point of take off.
I have known all along the revelation and answers to the worth and significance duo had to come from God himself! The Shun Amite lady (2 Kings 4) told Elisha she would not leave until he came back with her, she would accept no substitute. I am there. I have drawn my line in the sand and said I will not accept a temporary appeasement to make me feel better. I am getting the root of this sucker because honestly it deeply affects my spirit, the deepest pieces of me and leaves me lonely, afraid, and sick.
When I have a lot on my mind or a heavy heart I take a drive. Sometimes I go get lost some places, listen to music, talk to God, and sort my thoughts. I went for a drive tonight. I’m tired of being bogged down in this area of worth and significance. I’m tired of talking about it, sorting it, questioning it, surrendering it. I’m tired of being an EMOTIONAL basket case! I’m ready for my breakthrough. I’m ready to get to the other side already.
On my drive tonight I started telling myself out loud the things I wanted. I wanted to be picked; to be chosen, to be someone’s favorite. Somehow I couldn’t get my head around accepting the truths I remind other people about. The truth is God chose me. I have been reading it in scripture all over the place for weeks and weeks and tonight I finally spoke it out loud remembering the verses. God chose me I didn’t choose him. He picked me out of a crowd of people. He gave me wisdom, insight, and a gift of encouragement. I didn’t know to ask for those things until he put in my heart a desire to be a person of wisdom, insight, and encouragement. Somewhere he saw my heart and said, “Ah yes her heart is lovely and I can’t bear to be with out her. I pick her she’s my favorite. Let me grab my cross 'cause that one there, she’s coming with me!” In that one statement I realized I had what I wanted all along I just hadn’t accept it. It doesn’t take away the layers yet all the way but it does show evidence of progress. It shows me how to accept it, how to renew my mind, my heart, and my spirit. It’s a word of encouragement from the lord that identifies who I am, who’s I am, and who I am becoming.
It’s speaking life over a dead wound. I have no other choice. I have to keep speaking the truth over and over again, speaking to a problem head-on forces you to face it. I know it hurts but face it. Once you do it stops hurting so much, so stare it down, tell it where it stands, plant your footing, and hang on. Capacity is growing.
Judah Smith encouraged me with his preaching on being in the “Meantime” and meantime is where I am. I was encouraged as well because I seem to be right on track but I’m a bit seasick to be honest. Tonight was the end of conference and as I said on Monday, my world is definitely larger, and a greater revelation of God has unfolded before me. I got so much vision and purpose and truth. I’m so excited for the coming months. I have no idea what is in store, but everything is right on time. I feel the Holy Momentum rolling through my life and as each layer is peeled back it adds fuel to the flame encouraging me for soon coming speed; like rocket boosters reaching point of take off.
I have known all along the revelation and answers to the worth and significance duo had to come from God himself! The Shun Amite lady (2 Kings 4) told Elisha she would not leave until he came back with her, she would accept no substitute. I am there. I have drawn my line in the sand and said I will not accept a temporary appeasement to make me feel better. I am getting the root of this sucker because honestly it deeply affects my spirit, the deepest pieces of me and leaves me lonely, afraid, and sick.
When I have a lot on my mind or a heavy heart I take a drive. Sometimes I go get lost some places, listen to music, talk to God, and sort my thoughts. I went for a drive tonight. I’m tired of being bogged down in this area of worth and significance. I’m tired of talking about it, sorting it, questioning it, surrendering it. I’m tired of being an EMOTIONAL basket case! I’m ready for my breakthrough. I’m ready to get to the other side already.
On my drive tonight I started telling myself out loud the things I wanted. I wanted to be picked; to be chosen, to be someone’s favorite. Somehow I couldn’t get my head around accepting the truths I remind other people about. The truth is God chose me. I have been reading it in scripture all over the place for weeks and weeks and tonight I finally spoke it out loud remembering the verses. God chose me I didn’t choose him. He picked me out of a crowd of people. He gave me wisdom, insight, and a gift of encouragement. I didn’t know to ask for those things until he put in my heart a desire to be a person of wisdom, insight, and encouragement. Somewhere he saw my heart and said, “Ah yes her heart is lovely and I can’t bear to be with out her. I pick her she’s my favorite. Let me grab my cross 'cause that one there, she’s coming with me!” In that one statement I realized I had what I wanted all along I just hadn’t accept it. It doesn’t take away the layers yet all the way but it does show evidence of progress. It shows me how to accept it, how to renew my mind, my heart, and my spirit. It’s a word of encouragement from the lord that identifies who I am, who’s I am, and who I am becoming.
It’s speaking life over a dead wound. I have no other choice. I have to keep speaking the truth over and over again, speaking to a problem head-on forces you to face it. I know it hurts but face it. Once you do it stops hurting so much, so stare it down, tell it where it stands, plant your footing, and hang on. Capacity is growing.
Monday, August 2, 2010
Compound Interest
I’m a bit listless today, really tired and not sure why. I took time to rest this weekend too. I guess I need a bit more? I wonder what is significant in dreary days like today? I’m working with the focus of quittin’ time, forcing myself to the gym today, and really looking forward to an early bed time. It’s my day’s goal to be in bed with a post up by 9:30 tonight.
I’m thinking I should shift my focus find a way to make something about today stand out. Did Jesus ever waste a day? Or are the days like today maintenance days where we are a bit run down and just need to get some rest? There’s lots’ coming this week, it’s the week of Wave Conference. We will be in church directly after work for the rest of the week after tomorrow. But the week will surely end with my life unfolding a bit more, something will have shifted in the perspective of life, and I will have grasped a greater vision of the Father’s heart. I’m encouraged and excited for it to happen. Today though, I can’t wait to get in sweats and crawl into bed and it feels like a wasted day.
Maybe, putting one foot in front of the other, pushing through wanting to quit for the day, and doing the right things are the significant part of the day? I just want to quit today and start again tomorrow but if I quit today it may affect tomorrow and that’s not my goal. So maybe when there are dreary unfocused days the lesson is in the consistency of your character. I’m going to the gym because today is the only day I can go all week, I’m going to pray and spend time with God because no matter my day I need fellowship with him, and then I am going to go to bed and thank god for the day and that the end of things are better than the beginning. Maybe those little truths in my character are where the power in the day comes from. It’s not a bad day or a wasted day it’s just a consistent day and consistency changes things powerfully. You look up from consistent one day, and things are just different.
I’m thinking I should shift my focus find a way to make something about today stand out. Did Jesus ever waste a day? Or are the days like today maintenance days where we are a bit run down and just need to get some rest? There’s lots’ coming this week, it’s the week of Wave Conference. We will be in church directly after work for the rest of the week after tomorrow. But the week will surely end with my life unfolding a bit more, something will have shifted in the perspective of life, and I will have grasped a greater vision of the Father’s heart. I’m encouraged and excited for it to happen. Today though, I can’t wait to get in sweats and crawl into bed and it feels like a wasted day.
Maybe, putting one foot in front of the other, pushing through wanting to quit for the day, and doing the right things are the significant part of the day? I just want to quit today and start again tomorrow but if I quit today it may affect tomorrow and that’s not my goal. So maybe when there are dreary unfocused days the lesson is in the consistency of your character. I’m going to the gym because today is the only day I can go all week, I’m going to pray and spend time with God because no matter my day I need fellowship with him, and then I am going to go to bed and thank god for the day and that the end of things are better than the beginning. Maybe those little truths in my character are where the power in the day comes from. It’s not a bad day or a wasted day it’s just a consistent day and consistency changes things powerfully. You look up from consistent one day, and things are just different.
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